Local Commercials, Stop Yelling at Me

Have you ever cut on your television and started to watch your favorite program, and as soon as you get comfortable the commercials start?

"No worries," you think to yourself, "just another commercial."

And then BAMMM a nuclear reaction takes place and the loudest noise ever conceived comes through your television, and it happens to be the voice of the man at the car dealership down the road!

Then what is supposed to be his fun-loving child becomes a crazed voice on the other end of the psycho tube you're watching, "LOOOWWEEEERRR DDADDDDYYY!!!!!" (you Dothan folks know what I mean by this one :p).

Anyways, the above picture is Norton Furniture store's commercial that is notorious for being the strangest late-night commercial ever made by a local business (there are a few others by Norton Furniture that are equally as strange, this is just a captured frame from one of them). The poor citizens of Cleveland, Ohio get to experience this natural hallucinogen on their TV without even popping in Pink Floyd's The Wall DVD (which, if that were mixed with Norton's commercial then I'm pretty sure the antichrist or some other form of apocalyptic creature would be birthed, and it would simply yell loudly while putting everyone under the influence of LSD's illegitimate stepchild drug).

Not to mention the quality of local commercials is comparable to that found in a terrible 60's horror movie. BUY SOME BETTER CAMERAS! Seriously, why spend money on a commercial when you can take one on your cell phone, email it to yourself, and send that masterpiece to your local broadcasting station.

Of course then the quality might be a bit too good and slightly unbearable for them, wouldn't want it to be something worthwhile!

Just thought I would give a shoutout to the ridiculously loud, crappy commercials that I see every day.

Buy a new camera and turn the frickin' volume down. Cheers.

Trevor

District 9: Head Explosions at Their Finest

First off, let me say that you should see this movie. It was excellent. The plot was exceptionally well put-together, and the flow of the filming was very nicely done. At the beginning, it does a Cloverfield-esque film technique, then slowly transitions to standard filming.

Now for the most hardcore part of the movie: the exploding bodies. Literally.

Pretty much everyone that died did so via explosion. The best of these exploding targets were those who died by headshots.

A giant alien mech/robot thing fires a piece of death candy right into Akon's twin brother, the gang lord. I swear I thought that guy was Akon... Anyways, his snoz was drilled by some projectile/taser/facebomb thing. It was by far the most hardcore weapon ever, alongside the magnetic bullet-ball-thing (see the movie and you'll know what I mean, it happens right before homefry gets popped in the face with the head-specific c4).

Not only did Akon no.2 get his head blown off by Scarface's dream weapon, but he did so while sitting in his wheelchair. If that doesn't say helpless death I don't know what does. He deserved it though (again, see the film).

Anyways, if you want to see exploding bodies and total domination by machines whose destructiveness is rivaled only by that of the Terminators in the new Terminator: Salvation, check out this movie.

Nice job Peter Jackson, stick to aliens and their robots and leave King Kong on that island. That remake was terrible, but hey! Redemption is sweet, and even without the plot, sweet film techniques, etc., Peter Jackson was redeemed by this masterpiece and its gruesome, creative, and all-around manly deaths.

Trevor

The Unattractive Fabulousness of Hair Crimping

Ladies.

I honestly look at this and wonder: Were you high? Did you meet with Donald Trump for your hair consultation? This is almost as bad as Bermuda shorts. Almost.

Just thought I would enlighten everyone on this wonderful aspect of 80's society that is sadly becoming prevalent yet again.

Don't do this to yourself. It looks like the south side of a northbound goat.

Anyways, have a good day and don't straighten your hair with Sun Chips.

Trevor

...Ok I'm not done. This is terrible, I could regurgitate in your hairbrush before you got dressed, and you would dominate the above look after you ran that puppy through your hair.

I think I'll just wear guacamole on my face, that's attractive, right? Of course. Maybe this crimping thing isn't TOO bad.

What am I saying?! This is hideous! I would rather sit on a hot fire poker and spin than let a friend of mine out in public looking like that.

If you crimp your hair--

don't.

Better Than HDMI

Ok, so have you ever bought any kind of cheap audio or video cable at Wal-Mart, Target, Circuit City, Best Buy, or some other massive store and gotten CRAP quality? You pay for the store's brand (Dynex, etc.) or another cheap brand and get jipped. That sucks. But what happens when you pay 100$ FOR A MONSTER CABLE, or some other super-expensive, skinny piece of wire and it breaks after a few months use?! I'll tell you:

YOU GET HACKED OFF!

Recently this happened :( So I decided to look around for better cables. Surely there was some hanky-spanky American manufacturer shelling out some no-joke goods.

Well, you would be surprised how unbelievably non-existent that dream place really is.

...Except for one little piece of glory:

Blue Jeans Cables!

I'm about to order my first HDMI cable from them, and will follow up with a review later. But heck! I haven't read a bad thing yet! Just read their About Us on their website at bluejeanscable.com, it's impressive! It's a lawyer (I might be a bit biased :p) and his wife who originally started the company by hand-crafting the cables.

Now they have expensive, custom machines that do everything to their exact specs!

O, and Monster tried to sue them. Failed miserably, go back home, you el crapo cable.

Anyways, check them out, seriously. All wire is Belden (AMERICAN MADE!!) and they use their own connector ends and make the wire for you. I have read MULTIPLE reviews where people have compared them to top dollar Monster, Belkin, and other brand cables. All of the reviews say they blow them out of the water in price and performance. Guess what else?

THE TOP-OF-THE-LINE FOUUUURRRR FOOOOTTTT MONSTER CABLE IS 100$!!!

Wow.

But how much is the top-of-the-line, four foot, Blue Jeans Cable, that performs better, lasts longer, and is oh-so-American?

Are you ready?

$21.

WOW.

Twenty-one flippin' dollars. That's their most expensive, thickest, best model too.

The second-best model (most popular from what I hear) is 14.50$. If you're SUPER cheap, they offer a Chinese model, and from what I have been hearing, any of their cables, including their super-low-end model with Chinese parts, can compare to the quality and supposed manliness of the Monster cables.

So, if you're looking for speaker wire, analog audio/video interconnects, HDMI cables, or ANYTHING audio-video for that matter (including HDMI switches, which they sell, and which are usually super expensive, but only like 50$ here, and probably kill the competition), check out Blue Jeans Cable.

And if you don't, then--ok. But you should, it's American, it's better than the competition, it's cheaper, and it has denim in the title. What gets better than that? Did I mention it's CHEAPER?! 1/5th the price?!

So, make your decision wisely. Or avoid all audio-video products in general.

I choose the former! :)

Trevor

P.S. Just buy a Blue Jeans Cable product. Seriously.

P.S.S. The purple "wow's" are links.... click to see the prices...

Blogs

Ever wondered WHY people blog? ...Ya, me too. Despite the fact that Americans have too much time to waste (myself as a prime candidate), we have now added into the equation the wonderful world of blogging.

A lot of people are confused on what blogging actually is. But, to be honest, it's really quite simple! See you just write about---nothing. There really is no point.

"But there has to be SOME point or people wouldn't be doing it!"

Correct.

The point of my blog will be to talk about whatever sparks my interest that day! Whether it be potato chips or the color of the little "laser" lights on the laser-tag guns at the kids' play place down the road, it will probably be discussed here.

So, if you would like to join me on my quest to talk about--anything!--then do so! I just want to enjoy God's green earth and pretend it's not as bad as it really is.

YHWH bless,

Trevor

P.S. This was my topic for today, and was rather short. It was just an intro! :)